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…..Thank you Larry this is so funny.
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The Haircut
One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The florist was pleased and left the shop.
When the barber goes to open his shop the next morning there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop is happy and leaves the shop.
The next morning when the barber goes to open up there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.
Later that day, a college professor comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The professor is very happy and leaves the shop.
The next morning when the barber opens his shop, there is a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen different books, such as ‘How to Improve Your Business’ and ‘Becoming More Successful.
‘Then, a Congressman comes in for a haircut, and when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The Congressman is very happy and leaves the shop.
The next morning when the barber goes to open up, there are a dozen Congressmen lined up waiting for a free haircut.
And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the members of our Congress.—
Vote carefully this year.
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The Dying Priest and The Clinton’s
The old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years, he had faithfully served the people of the nation’s capital in Washington D.C. He motioned for his nurse to come near. “Yes, Father?” said the nurse.
“I would really like to see President Bill and Senator Hillary Clinton before I die,” whispered the priest.
“I’ll see what I can do, Father” replied the nurse.
The nurse sent the request to the Senate and waited for a response. Soon the word arrived; the Clintons would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Hillary commented to Bill, “I don’t know why the old priest wants to see us, but it certainly will help our images and might even get me elected President. After all, I’m IN IT TO WIN IT.”
Bill agreed-it was a very good thing for her campaign once they put out a press release about it.
When they arrived at the priest’s room, the old priest took Bill’s hand in his right hand and Hillary’s hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest’s face.
Finally Bill Clinton spoke. “Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?”
The old priest slowly replied, “I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”
“Amen” said Bill.
“Amen” said Hillary.
The old priest continued……”He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same.”
….Thank you Lynn for these funny jokes. hahaa
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Dilemma
The Democratic Party has a crisis of monumental proportions:
They don’t know whether to vote for the “Nut” with two Boobs or for the “Boob” with two Nuts!
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….Thank you Mark for this video it is so funny.
HOMELAND SECURITY AT THE BARROW, ALASKA AIRPORT
….Thank you Jack this is great, I love bears. hahaha
I love Ray Stevens tunes.
Outstanding!!! Loved them all.
Me too Tom, I gave this Ray Stevens song to my mother in law, Margaret, who has a fantastic sense of humor.
I think his best was the Shriners Convention.
Tom me too he is so good.
Jack that is so neat, thanks for the link and for sharing about Margaret.
Mark yessss I agree.
Blame it all on global warming since the ice fragments melted and BOO BOO BEAR has nothing else to do but marshall aircraft… ON THE ACTIVE RUNWAY! Love your pictured 2008 HEE HAW Defeatocrats!!
Darth, LOL I am glad you got to see these.