This letter is a thing of beauty (even if the language is a bit rough). You definitely feel the guy’s pain! An actual letter to the passport office.
Dear Sirs,
I’m in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this. How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a cable TV from them back in 1987, and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date. For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have on my social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my driver’s license, on the last eight damn passports I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out before being allowed off the plane over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done at election times.
Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother’s name is Maryanne, my father’s name is Robert and I’d be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!
I apologize; I’m really pissed off this morning. Between you an’ me, I’ve had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my house, and then you ask me for my fu**in’ address. What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal assholes working there! Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don’t want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy beach.
And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I’d sure as hell not want to tell anyone!
Well, I have to go now, ’cause I have to go to the other end of the city and get another fu**in’ copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60. Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that’d be to damn easy and maybe makes sense. You’d rather have us running all over the fu**in’ place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some asshole to confirm that it’s really me on the damn picture – you know, the one where we’re not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic fu**in’ morons). Hey, you know why we can’t smile? We’re totally pissed off!
Signed
An Irate Citizen.
P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it’s me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776. I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had security clearances up the yin yang. However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am – you know someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA!
Sincerely,
You Sure In The Hell Should Know Who.
And we want them to run our health care?!?
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And this one too that is a classic.
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Wild Thing’s comment……
LOL the one at the top of the post, the letter, I know just how he feels. All the thing’s one has to go through in dealing with anything to do with the government.
….Thank you Jim for sending this to me.
This has got to be universal in any government, State government too. When we moved to Pennsylvania, I had to get a Pennsylvania Drivers license. Of course there is none out here in the sticks, so we had to drive for an hour to get to Muncy, where an office was located. Took a number, we got there at 9 O’clock AM about Noon we got called just to find out that my Drivers License from Ohio, wasn’t enough, I needed more proof of who I was. Birth Certificate, proof of residence and marriage certificate.
A week went by and we went back to Muncy, BC in hand, Bills from the house, which are in My wifes name.
After another 3 hour wait, we got there showed my BC, Ohio Drivers License, and the Jerk…er clerk says do you have any proof of where you live. My wife had to sign an affidavit that Yes I do live with her at the same address. So even with my birth certificate, Drivers License from Ohio and my wifes signature, they were still skeptical.
Finally, I said, in frustration, what if I were an Illegal Alien ? And (I kid you not) He said, under his breadth, ” Thats different”.
These nitwits think they can run Health Care ? I had to show more information about myself on the first visit to get a stupid drivers license, in fact more information than obama did for President.
Good letter. It is obviously easier to be president than to get a passport.
Mark, love your response to them.
And what he said back to you oh my gosh.
hahahahaha
Tom, yess it sure seems like it.